Children of the Jeans

Here we go, Thursday again.  That must mean it’s time for another installment of the Jeans Day Weekly!  It’s SEPTEMBER now, for those who haven’t made a “What? September, already?!” comment.

And it’s back to school time!  “YEY!” say all the parents.  Remember when being a kid meant not even giving a care, and wearing silly cute things like this?

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Well those were the good ol’ days.  Here’s what kids are wearing to school these days.
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I mean, can you even go to kindergarten without a Prada handbag and a designer shoelace around your neck these days? The answer is NO, you ignorant asshole, don’t you dare.

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This little book boy is going to grow up to be the most adorable cocktail mixologist that Gastown has ever seen.  Or maybe an industrial furniture designer.  Only time will tell!

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This child prodigy’s ensemble probably cost more than my monthly salary, but DAMN does he look good.  Notice the way he looks off into the distance, no doubt pondering his next great legal arguments: staying up past 8:00 pm and being allowed to manage his own LinkedIn page.

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I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that this nugget is already aspiring to be an Instagram “model”, or that I’m unreasonably intimidated by her.  She reminds me of all those “cool” girls in elementary school who wanted nothing to do with me and my Jazzy Jewelry.

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I was cat-fished by this little bro on Bumble last week.  He told me he just drinks a lot of coffee so it stunted his growth, but it still didn’t sit well with me so I cut him loose.  But he opened the car door for me!  Awwww.
(For the record, we didn’t drive anywhere. We just sat in his “roommates’ ” driveway and played with slime.)

 

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