Last week we explored the notion of “Is it even really Friday if no Jeans Day email was sent out the day before?”
Answer: Of course it is! But now I know just how many people depend on these emails to inform them on what day of the week it is! I take great joy in that for some reason. Oh, it’s the false sense of power. That’s it. As if I have any control over anything in my life these days AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA!!!! Anyways…
These flaming trees and the autumnal breeze have got me feeling all sorts of cozy. Sometimes I just want to kick back with my dogs, sip a pumpkin spice (tea) latte, and TEAR APART some engagement photos! Because I’m a bitter old husk of a woman who doesn’t believe in love anymore. (jk…sort of)
EXHIBIT A – Carly & Pascal
Lovers posing in front of a dilapidated building because marriage is WORK and it will BREAK. YOU. DOWN. And marriages break down. Fun symbolism!
On an unrelated note, does anyone need some shiplap for their rustic modern home?! What a treasure trove!
EXHIBIT B – Dave & Kristin
“Babe, look how cute and in love our feet are! AwwwwWWWWW!”
If you look carefully, you can see me sitting in the background rolling my eyes as hard as eyes can roll.
EXHIBIT C – Mark & Claire
Wow, I mean just WOW. I just can’t even believe how spontaneous and candid this couple is. I mean, they were just walking through this picturesque grove when he told her such a good joke just as a gentle northwesterly breeze showered leaves all over them, and then he was so overcome with love, that he hoisted her into the air for a playful embrace. AND here was a photographer handy! I mean what are the chances?!?!
EXHIBIT D – Jamie & Roger
“Heh heh heh, he’s mine now and he has no idea what he’s – Hmm? Oh nothing dear. I love you too. Tee hee!”
EXHIBIT E – Lily & Anthony
Marriage is back-breaking work — physically, mentally, emotionally. Why not be cute AND practical while harvesting pears in your backyard orchard? As if to say “we know that marriage is hard, but our young bodies and naive minds are up for it!” As much as it may pain me to admit, this is actually pretty darn adorable. No! NO!!
EXHIBIT F – Gina & Scott
Do they even like each other? Maybe. But only enough to meet under a bridge and gently place polite hands on each other for their bridge-troll-inspired engagement shoot. I think these two are going to make it.
EXHIBIT G – Ashley & Patrick
Ahhh, this is more my style. An old chum type of shot that was probably taken by one of their moms at Thanksgiving because she just wants “a nice picture of the two of you. Smile!” They’ve been dating since they were 16, so the magic is mostly gone. Dead.
Now get out of here you hopeful sacks of mush! Go jump in a pile of leaves with your lovers! Go on, git!